Radhika Apte on age and desire: At 41, she says she knows herself better

Radhika Apte is speaking openly about ageing, desire and the silence that surrounds both. The actress, now 41, says she understands her body and her needs far better today than she did in her 20s or 30s. Her comments come alongside Lust Stories 3, in which she plays a woman in her 40s and female sexuality sits at the centre of the story.

Apte pushes back against the idea that growing older means decline. She reportedly described society as deeply ageist, a place where getting old is treated as a kind of deterioration. Looking back, she joked that people in their 20s are busy doing everything their parents warned them against, while in their 30s they begin to panic that their parents may have had a point.

The 40s, in her view, are about finding your own space. She reportedly called this the peak time for desire and understanding your own needs, adding that she feels the fittest, youngest and most alive she has ever been. Motherhood played a part too, she said, because the body changes so much that you end up learning it all over again.

The actress also acknowledged that desire is still a taboo subject in many parts of Indian society, especially for women. She reportedly said the problem starts with basic equality and the freedom to think and speak, and admitted that she too grew up believing sex was dirty. She questioned why the desires of men and women are judged so differently when intimacy is something shared.

Now a mother herself, Apte wants her daughter to grow up without the shame that usually comes with conversations about sexuality. She recalled a book in which the author described being scolded by his father as a boy after being caught exploring his own body, a shame he carried for the rest of his life. She has decided she will never react that way if her daughter discovers her own desires.

For Apte, the deeper issue is an inner voice that has been pushed down in both men and women, in different ways. Her remarks challenge the notion that a woman should feel, want or say less simply because she is getting older.